Sex is a relatively important part of any healthy relationship, so it’s at least somewhat necessary to be on the same page as your partner when it comes to sexual desires and needs. A desire discrepancy between two partners can lead to problems with accepting differences in relationships and moving past them.
If you don’t seem to possess the sexual sync with your partner that you want, don’t take it too personally. Often, all it takes is an open conversation to help both you and your significant other find some common ground.
Finding a Similar Sexual Level as Your Partner
Sometimes, when you find someone you jive with on an emotional and intellectual level, you’re not always thinking about how compatible you both are when it comes to sexual desires. But since a discrepancy in sexual wishes can lead to some difficulties in a relationship, it’s important to consider how you can find ways around any desire discrepancy you and your partner may face.
If you find that you’re the partner with the extra-high sexual boost, then it’s crucial to never pressure your partner into having sex. If your significant other is open and honest about what it takes for them to enjoy sex, then consider whether those requests are things you can also enjoy. One of the best ways to handle a higher sex drive is to try to be understanding of the other individual’s sexual preferences.
Do you find yourself on the opposite end of the sexual desire spectrum? Sometimes, a low sex drive can hurt your confidence and make you believe there’s something wrong. You want to make your partner happy, but you just can’t seem to find the libido to get started.
If you’re struggling with an abnormally low sex drive, there may be a few health factors at play that are keeping you from being sexually happy. Consider talking with a gynecologist or physician who can better assist you in finding the cause of your issue.
Remember, though, that one of the major early red flags in relationships to be on the lookout for is sexual dominance or power that forces you to do acts beyond your level of comfort. Any desire discrepancy should lead to accepting differences in relationships and changing them as a pair — not pushing your partner’s set of needs to the side in a selfish attempt to gratify your own.
Desire Discrepancy and Asking for What You Want in Bed
At times, the issue with different sexual desires can be chocked up to a mere inability to figure out how to ask for what you want in bed. Sometimes, your partner knows precisely what to do to turn you on. But in many instances, partners will live in the dark about the other’s sexual needs until they spell it out a little clearer.
If there exists an emotional barrier in communication with your partner, it can be tricky to express your wishes and desires with confidence. Consider setting aside some time to be open and honest about your needs while being sure to compliment your significant other’s efforts, too.
Remember that the goal is to encourage your partner to be open to new things that’ll keep you both happy. A few compliments about their current efforts will allow them to see that you appreciate their attempts while making them open to the idea that there’s always room for change and improvement, too.
Why You’ll Benefit from Sexual Harmony
Sex should be fun — and it’s even better when you share that moment of passion with someone you love. In fact, getting busy in bed may just help keep you healthy, too. Research studies show that engaging in sexual activities offers many health-related benefits, such as increasing your flexibility, regulating your hormones and helping you maintain healthy cardiovascular health, too.
One of the top causes of low energy in females is depression, and it often not only negatively impacts your mental health, but your libido, too. However, in some cases, if your lack of desire simply stems from feelings of sadness, the hormones and chemical compounds released during sex can influence your brain and cheer you up. This is different than depression though, and if you think you may be suffering from depression, it’s important to seek mental health support from friends, family or a professional.
Accepting Differences in Relationships
If you find yourself experiencing the dreaded desire discrepancy, accepting differences in relationships is often the best piece of advice you can get to overcome this hurdle. No two people are quite the same — you and your partner included. This means that your sex-drives, preferences and desires may differ, too, and that’s okay.
While sex can be a touchy subject, it’s best to work through your differences together. When you find common ground that satisfies the two of you, your life will be much easier, happier and sexually-pleasing moving forward.